Probably my favorite person to watch is Zesty. He's cute, and adorable. Everyone talks to him. Random waitresses stop to poke his cheeks. He stops traffic in WalMart.
He's also what I talk about 80% of the time.
Today I was waiting for Mr Lemon to be done in the chiropractor's office so I could go and get cracked into shape. Another patient and her son (9ish?) walked into the waiting room as well. Zesty did his cute little "Hi!" to her, and put his head down on my knee.
It is stinking adorable every time.
She asked me, "Is this your first baby?" and I eagerly nodded. She then proceeded to ask me his name, what's he doing new, look at all those teeth! and have I ever tried giving him a frozen pretzel to gnaw on to ease his teething?
All those fun questions that I am so willing to share the answers even with a total stranger.
As we left the office, I told Mr Lemon about her. It occurred to me that the best conversationalists ask questions about what interests the other party. I didn't know a thing about her - didn't ask about her equally cute and adorable son - didn't ask if she had other children - didn't ask how she made it through the day with toddler age children.
I just didn't ask.
What does that say about me? Did she leave that conversation thinking "I should get that lady's phone number, she seemed like a nice person I'd like to get to know better," or did she think "Another new mother with nothing better to do than to brag and boast about her perfect little baby."
Am I so stuck on myself that I just expect other people to talk about what interests me?
I read a book a long time ago, Personality Plus by Florence Littaeur. It covers the four personality types such as Choleric, Melancholy, Sanguine and Phlegmatic. I keenly recall some advice she gave to the Sanguine - to tell only every other story that he/she thinks about, so all conversations don't revolve around the Sanguine and his/her adventures.
The last few weeks I've committed to spending less time on the interweb as a time of consecration to God. It has not necessarily been a hard thing, so much as an awareness thing. I'm more aware of what's going on in the "real" world, more aware of the things God deals with me about, more aware of what is deep in my heart that I don't reveal.
Although I don't have an agenda for the blog, with a Bible thumpin' message every time, I also don't want to be just the fluffy cupcake writer that goes on and on and ON about her kids. Maybe it's just a matter of finding the balance of myself as a woman of God aside from my role as a mother, a wife.
Am I making any sense? What do you do in your life to help you keep the balance?
4 comments:
Excellent blog with a great message. Thanks for sharing.
I am an uber dork, so I have lists to help keep life in balance. I literally put reminders in my phone to go off every morning that I have to physically look at, acknowledge, and check off each and every day. Most of them are the same items every day because I am that dense. I have a reminder to "Honor God and Impact People" - that is the mission of our church. I have others, but that is the one that I have to force myself to look at everyday. It is humbling.
That's what I do, but I am weird.
Thank you for that advice, Mrs. Lemon. This sanguine needed to hear it ;)
I, too, have found myself leaving conversations like that realizing the same thing. I feel the same way you did.
I don't have an answer to your question and I appreciate the challenge to think on it. I will. Much.
Additionally, you can thump my Bible any day you want, MizLemon.
Smart women know that every mother thinks her child is the cutest and smartest, and the most adorable to watch. And even smarter women know---you can always make a friend letting a mother talk about her child. I don't think that woman left the conversation any less uplifted than you. What a nice woman though, eh?
I have a very hard time finding balance. But a friend once told me, when she talks too much, and doesn't listen enough, she knows that she is "off-balance" and needs to focus more on her personal and spiritual edification and it recenters her and she can more easily become, the "question-asker". I think I might be the same way.
I've been talking nonstop for the last 8 years.
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